Day 64 - Weigh-In #9

Today I totally expected to have gained at least a pound.  My in-laws were visiting the last few days, so I made some bigger meals, and we went out a couple times, and wine was a necessary part of the weekend. I lost 3 pounds.  Holy crap!  I am down to 178, which also means I have lost a total of 20 pounds since January 1.  YAY!!!

I am beyond happy.  I have 8 pounds to my total goal weight.  I probably won't make it within the 90 days I had originally hoped, but I don't care about that anymore.  I just can't believe how relatively easy Weightwatchers has made this, and that I have stayed with it this long.  I'm easily distracted by shiny things, and keeping with anything for more than 2 months is a big deal for me. 

So 20 lbs down, 8 to go.  Maybe I will even work out more again.  Well, lets not get too crazy. 

This is Bobby's birthday too, so Happy Birthday to my sweet little baby who is turning exactly 1 in just 2 more hours.  Being told to 'Push Through The Pain' seems like much less than a year ago.  And with birthdays comes cake.  I already ate my way through one cake this weekend. Cupcakes tonite. More cupcakes this weekend.  I sense a lot of soup in my future to balance out all that cake.

Day 57 - Weigh-In #8

No tracking this week, and I lost a pound - down to 181.  I will totally take that, a loss is a loss.  And I CAN make decisions about food that don't involve stuffing my face with garbage without having to be a tracking fool.  Lets see if this can continue.

Day 50 - Weigh-In #7

This week I stayed at 182 and lost nothing.  But ate like a maniac and had a few drinks, so overall, pretty psyched with hitting this wall.  I can't even call it a plateau or anything, because I was just eating lot of wrong things, and only managed to make up for it by being really good at lunch time. Dang snacking at night still gets the best of me.  I cannot be trusted with cheese or chocolate in the house.  But gotta get back in to the swing of things next week.

I also fell off the wagon of tracking my points religiously - like if I didn't track it, I really hadn't eated all that crap.  But since its been a couple of days without tracking, I may try a little experiment and see if I can do it without tracking and make better decisions on my own.  Because I really proved what a responsible adult I am this week.

Day 43 - Weigh In #6

I am catching up on tracking all of this here because we got a new toy that I am rarely able to get my hands on - a Macbook Pro. And I find it annoying to blog on my iPad, not good enough on typing there.

Anyway, I lost another 1.5 lbs at this weigh in, down to 182.  I had something of a mediocre week of eating, but stayed right around my overall point allowance, so this was still good.

Day 36 - Weigh In #5

This morning, got on the scale and more happiness.  183.5.  That is another 1.5 pounds lost.  And after I ate half a loaf of sourdough bread stuffed with cheese, I'm really ecstatic.  If I hadn't eaten butter, bread, cheese, pepperoni, more butter, chocolate and eggs like they were being discontinued from the planet last night, I may have even done better.  But the Super Bowl feast was fabulous and I still lost weight. 

If I had any portion control, I'd totally make stuff like that more often and just have a little.  But I don't, and if you put a roll in front of me, I will eat it.  If you put a several loaves of bread in front of me, I'll eat it.  All of it.  So, I'm sticking with my weightwatchers recipes for now.  But again, thank goodness that weightwatchers gives me the flexibility to do a little cheating and not be derailed.  I'd go nuts if I couldn't splurge sometimes.

And in the words of my son whenver he finishes doing a puzzle all by himself, "Oh yeah, I did it, oh yeah, I did it."

Day 35 - Super Bowl

Today is the Super Bowl, and I saved and I saved and squandered nearly every point that remained.

Mark and I had an amazing day with the boys (even though Bobby was a little manic from teething, he was generally a happy boy - and James had such a great day).  We settled in to watch the Super Bowl on our own, and I made some fun snacks that are so wrong when you are trying to lose weight.  Bloomin' Pizza Bread (thanks, Dana!) for a appetizer/dinner, and dessert was Roy's Molten Lava cakes, both from The Girl Who Ate Everything.  I totally recommend checking out her blog, even if it may crash and burn your diet.  Its worth the splurge, and some of it is healthy.  But there is so much that is full of fat and goodness that it will derail you quickly.  But it all sounds soooooooooooooooo good.

And the Pizza Bread was as fabulous as I remembered, and the Lava Cakes were divine.  And I spent 55 points on Super Bowl Sunday.  But that still left me 2 points for the week, so I didn't go over my allowance still.  But thinking back (since I'm writing this the day after), I think I missed a couple points here and there, so I probably did actually.  Here's hoping that it didn't kill my week of weight loss.

If you want to check out the blog and fabulous recipes I mentioned above, check out: http://www.the-girl-who-ate-everything.com/.   Your life will never be the same.  The Lava Cakes are the actual recipe used at Roy's on Hawaii (and now scattered all over the mainland).  I'm drooling just thinking about it.

Day 29 - Another Weigh In, Another Pound

Weigh-in number 4: 1 more pound lost.  Small loss, but a loss.  I'll take it after a week filled with stress, sadness and chocolate. Not to mention, some other issues including TMI TMI TMI TMI.  TMI.  And then there is TMI.  Watermelon, watermelon, watermelon.

Anyway, I had some good discussions and meetings at work today so in order to celebrate the last few days of work that were good after my bummer news last week, I had a cookie from Potbelly.  I looooooooooooove their Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Goodness.  So I had a 9 point Turkey sandwich and a cookie, a 12 freaking point cookie.  But it was a pretty fabulous 12 points.  Now I just need to not do that every day.  I had a taste of the good stuff, its tempting to fall of the wagon, eat some cookies and then slowly roll away from the wagon, then not be able to get back to the wagon because I'm too fat to chase it.

So I had a dinner of leftover roast pork tenderloin, mashed sweet potatoes and green beans.  Really yummy, but in order to minimize diving into my cheaty points, it was a smaller size dinner.  And now I'm starving.  Not sure what to eat because I'm going to get cranky without food, but it can't have a lot of points.  Hmmmmm.

But, another week, another pound.  I'll take it.  13 pounds lost so far, lucky 13. Oy.

Day 24 Addendum - The Whole Story

OK, on Facebook and this blog I have been vague about something going on in my life, and a mystery meeting in Chicago.  Here's the whole story.

A few months ago, the Branch Chief job in my old office in Chicago was opened as a result of some shifting in positions that happened (the old Branch Chief was removed from his supervisory duties).  I inquired about the job and talked at great lengths with the Division Director there (who is the Branch Chief's boss) about the opportunity and when it was advertised, I applied.  I interviewed 2 Fridays ago (Jan 13 - Friday the 13th, should have been a sign).  And have been waiting for an answer since then.  I felt really good about the interview, and the Division Director seemed really happy at the end of it, so I thought I had a good chance.  Unfortunately, on the panel of 3 that interviewed me, I couldn't read the other two panelists very well, so I wasn't sure where I stood with them.  But, I'm not often that confidant coming out of an interview, so I really believed things were going to work out.

The idea of going back to Chicago was not something we were looking for when this opportunity came up, but the more we thought about it and as the reality of the opportunity sank in, we got really excited about going back.  Being closer to our families would be great.  Reuniting with so many friends would be great.  We've been talking about needing to move or redo our house a bit to have enough space for our wild boys, so this seemed like perfect timing.

I've been getting some signs, such as how long it was taking to hear anything, that things were not looking good.  I got the call today that I did not get selected.  It is very disappointing, and frustrating because I had been so confidant.  But what I've been able to gather from some people outside of the process is that I didn't have enough staff management experience.  And until someone gives me the chance to manage staff, that isn't going to change.  So, I'm going thru all the emotions you would expect, and trying to get to acceptance.  But I need to wallow for a night.  I'm blogging on my couch in the comfiest clothes I have - Strawberry Shortcake pajama pants and a green Gap circa 1995 hooded sweatshirt (for my college roommates: the Rocky Sweatshirt).  We are watching 40-Year-Old Virgin and I am going to go get me some chocolate.  Tomorrow I will move on and figure out what I want to do with my life, tonight I wallow.

So usually when I am in this state of mind, I eat.  A lot.  Then eat more.  So I'm trying to limit my chocoholism tonight with just a little pudding snack.  But there may be some truffles in my future too.  Weightwatchers and crappy news are not really partners.  Chocolate and crappy news - best friends.

Day 24 - Doing Donuts

A coworker brought in donuts today and I decided I could have one little donut and it would be ok.  They can't be THAT awful.  And it tastes so lovely.  Maybe if I didn't pick the Double Chocolate cake donut, that part about not being so awful would be true.  10 points.  1/3 of my daily points. For 3 minutes of chololatey delight - if it even took me that long to scarf it down. 

So, soup for lunch.  Soup for dinner too.  Damn, that donut hurts.  I like soup, don't get me wrong.  But after only eating soup the rest of the day, and maybe a snack of yogurt, I'm picturing turning into Chris Farley in drag, in one of my favorite SNL skits with him, "BACK OFF ME, I'M STARVING!!!"

I almost had to cut a bitch yesterday on the train, and I wasn't starving then.  I should be a delight riding the Metro tonight.

Day 22 - Weigh-in, III

Weighed myself this morning and was done to 186, another 2 pounds bite the dust! (Insert theme music here).

Celebrated with my new favorite dish at Noodles & Co for lunch - Bangkok Curry.  Some leftover pork and sweet potato stew for dinner and had plenty of points for some baked ruffles as a snack after the boys went to sleep.

Speaking of sleep, I'm writing this after feeding Bobby at 4:40am and really hoping he goes back to sleep right now.  Mommy wants to sleep to.  Doesn't that sound like an awesome idea?  Go to sleep.  Sigh.

Almost caught up on blogging now too.  Nothing exciting for Monday, January 23 - you know, other than losing a total of 12 pounds in three weeks.  Because I am just that awesome.

Seriously, dude, go to sleep.

OK, maybe Weightwatchers is that awesome, and it suits my neurotic tendencies perfectly, so it works for me.  Details, details.

Bobby is quiet now...possibly a good sign.

Now if I can get an exercise routine down, I should be in good shape (literally) in my 90 day goal.

Video monitor shows what appears to be a sleeping baby - dare I rise and return to my bed?

So that brings Day 22 to a close, and I am going to attempt to crawl back into bed without hitting that magical button that makes Bobby scream the minute I am curled up under my blanket again.  I wish I could find that damn button and throw it down the garbage disposal.

Day 21 - Week 3 closes, Cheaty points rule

This was another good week for me dieting.  A truly crappy week for me working out.

I ate a pita sandwich and soup for lunch - made a WW recipe of jambalaya with shrimp and turkey smoked sausage for dinner.  All yummy, and did use a few cheaty points in snacks and the Keurig mocha we bought on Saturday, which, incidentally, is freaking amazing.  A lovely mix of the caffeine jolt of coffee with the yumminess of hot chocolate.  Not sure I will ever drink anything else.  Ever.  Again.

Haven't worked out at all this week.  Slacker.  I'm tired, which is a crap excuse, but I am.  Bobby keeps waking up over night and I get at most 3-4 hours of continuous sleep any given night, often less - with a grand total of maybe 6-7 hours a night.  I need 8 hours a night. (Thus the addition of coffee to my morning)  Its so hard to get motivated to workout when I want to curl up on the couch and play with my iPad, read or watch something educational on TV - like Biggest Loser or Project Runway (don't you judge me).

But to end this week on a high note - I have 28 points of my 49 cheaty points left for the week.  I have a little personal goal of having at least 30 flex points leftover at the end of the week, so I was pretty much right there. Hoping for another good weigh-in on Monday.

Day 20 - Burritos better than Chipotle

That's right, I said it.  I actually like a Fast/Casual Mexican place MORE than Chipotle.  Qdoba.  How I love you, Qdoba.  And the one we go to has Kids Eat Free on weekends.  James loves a Quesadilla as much as I love a burrito, so everyone wins.

Saturday, January 21 - after James and I went to the Gym for his class Saturday morning, we picked up Daddy and Bobby from home and ran some errands down in Woodbridge, which just happens to be down the street from Qdoba.  I tried the "Craft 2" for the first time - which you get to pick 2 menu items as a combo (each a mini version).  Tortilla soup and a mini naked burrito.  Heavenly.  So flipping good.  And just 9 points.  I had 3 points worth of chips and guac too, for a grand total of 12 points and I was good and full.  Fabulous.

We decided to have Make Your Own Pizza night for dinner, since ordering pizza would be an obscene amount of points.  I made mini pizzas for myself on wheat pitas with tomatoes, fresh basil and green peppers - tossed in a little olive oil and balsamic vinegar.  Sprinkle that on the pitas, bake then add a tiny bit of mozzarella, bake a couple more minutes until melted.  Fabulous.  I love balsamic vinegar, this was so perfect for me.  2 whole pita pizzas were 15 points total, so a little high, but I had cheaty points to apply still, and only used a few.  And again, totally full afterward.

Another fabulous, happy day of food.  Didn't think I'd be saying during my diet.  "Starving and want to eat everything in site" is more where I thought I would be right now.  So happy there is good WW recipes, and some of my favorite places offer such good options.

If you are looking for a good fast/casual place on WW, and there is one near you - go to Qdoba.  Their website has an awesome nutritional calculator that lets you build your meal, and see exactly how much calories, fat, carbs, etc. there is as you add each topping or item.  So easy.

Day 19 - Cheating, but not really

I'm catching up on a few days of blogging because my computer was otherwise dedicated to being backed up to our new online service and our new external hard drive.  I missed you, laptop.  So this is about Friday, January 20.

Lunch was at Noodles and Co and I had the Bangkok Curry with Shrimp - and it was fabulous that it is low enough in points that I could get the large.  It is so so so yummy, I'm now addicted.  Rice noodles, and coconut cream sauce with curry, veggies, shrimp and top with some hot sauce, and life is good.  Plus it was a nice lunch away from the office with work friends, and was entertaining as always.  I did spend a few minutes drooling over the cookie that one of my friends got...a few weeks ago I would have gotten a cookie, or worse yet one of those giant Rice Krispie treats and chowed down on the whole thing.  Its a stupid amount of points as I have learned, so I've given that up entirely until I get to a maintenance phase.

Dinner was a fun treat - James was in a good mood when we picked the boys up from daycare so we went out to eat to Boardwalk Burgers and Fries.  Surprisingly, a burger is 'only' 10 points when there is no cheese or anything by veggies and mustard on it.  Really not that bad.  But I binged a little on fries, which were 7 more points.  So I was over for the day, but only went 5 or so points into my flex points for all that. I'll take it.  Like I've said before, my flex points are saved for cheating on weekends.

And with the flex points, its nice to 'cheat' on a regular diet with this special allowance of cheaty points.  I love my cheaty points.  But my goal is also to use them as little as possible.  The last time I did WW, I stayed away from flex points except for special occasions and going out for Happy Hour.  With the little ones, Happy Hour is rare, so now they are for the occasional take-out, dining out or other special occasion.

I love cheaty points, but I feel such a sense of accomplishment when I don't need them at the end of a week.

Day 16 - Take my points, please

I wound up with 2 extra points Tuesday at the end of the night, after snacking my way thru the afternoon. 

I forgot to bring yogurt to work, so no breakfast other than my coffee with cream.

Lunch was Healthy Request soup and a salad with the only points being balsamic vinaigrette and two little spheres of mozzarella.

So I got home with 19 points to burn and ate a single serving of a WW recipe I had made earlier in the week (Vietnamese Flank Steak with rice).  12 points left.

I'm starving after dinner so I have some cheese and crackers.  7 points left.

Popcorn with Mark, and a sugar-free pudding snack.  2 points left.

That felt great when I added in my little snacks and had points left.  Amazing what eating really well throughout the day can do.  Although if I would have had my yogurt, I wouldn't have had the popcorn, but I also may not have been so hungry for dinner if I would have eaten more consistently.  I've never been a breakfast person, but my morning yogurt has really seemed to help keep me from starving at lunchtime and wanting to go directly to Chik-fil-A and order the entire menu.

And the Yoplait Lights have some ridiculously awesome flavors.  Cinnamon Roll and White Chocolate Strawberry are totally my favorite so far.  Although Mark ate the Raspberry Cheesecake flavor yesterday and said that was awesome, so I still will need to try that.  Seriously, why did I hate yogurt for 36 years?

Now its early Wednesday and I am hungry, but trying to figure out if I eat now, or just have coffee and eat my yogurt at work to help get me thru the morning. Ah, this is definitely a case of white people problems. (Confused? - watch the Charles Barkley episode of SNL from a couple weeks ago).

Day 15 - Weigh in - Part Deux

Wooooooooooooooooooooooooot!!!

I weighed myself yesterday, and hadn't lost any weight.  But it was a different time than I normally weigh-in, I had eaten some already, I was fully dressed.  Blah blah excuse excuse blah blah.

Did my normal weigh-in first thing this morning for my official WW weigh-in - 188!  That is 2 more pounds gone!  And it feels good to completely put the 190s behind me.  That leaves 18 more pounds ahead of me, with a goal date of 75 more days.  2 pounds is fabulous too, considering how much I lost last week. 

I have not been as fabulous about working out as I should be, I've been doing about every other day instead of every day like P90 is intended to be done.  But I'm still working out.  And I'm hoping to continue to improve here too.  Its probably the only way to keep losing weight at a good rate - got to keep amping up working out and following WW, and I should be able to get to my goal in the 90 days I am shooting for.

So I've been slacking on the blog for a few days.  I was frustrated with my eating - which I was doing well with, but was trying to avoid my flex points but was hungry a lot.  I tried to make a 'smart' choice at Chili's in O'Hare on Friday and it wound up being 18 points even with all the 'guiltless' changes made to my Santa Fe Wrap.  A little annoying but it wound up not mattering because I didn't eat much dinner the way timing of my flight worked out.  But its a shame that Chili's smaller menu at airports doesn't have any of the true guiltless choices that they offer in their normal restaurants.

And once again, as a reward for doing so well, WW took another daily point away from me.  I'm still trying to think of this as a good thing because it means I'm losing weight.  But I'm going to miss this point a little more than last time.

Day 11 - Cosi, take two

I fully intended to eat lunch at my desk and have some soup to make up for the damage I did yesterday with the big ole burger.  But a good friend that I've worked with while I've been at FEMA was in town and we grabbed some lunch before he flew home.  Went back to Cosi (which I went to earlier this week and totally screwed the pooch on my salad selection.  Turns out they have a Bombay Chicken Salad (Lite) that is only a whopping 4 points!  Fab-u-lous!  Saved plenty of points for another birthday cupcake and still a few left over for the day.  Maybe I'll have one more little snack this evening, and I will be right at my points.  Woo hoo!

Nothing much exciting today, other than I'm blowing off working out again to prepare for my travel and meeting tomorrow.  Too much to do tonite.  That will be a convenient excuse all the time, but I really have to do a lot of preparing still, and get a really good night's sleep.  Cannot wait for tomorrow! More on that later....

Day 10 - You Say it MY Birthday

My birthday present to myself is to skip my workout (not my wisest choice, but I had a rough day at work and am exhausted) and the use of a few more flex points.  15 to be exact.  Yowzers.  Mark offered to go out and bring in some dinner after the boys were in bed.  And I opted for a yummy cheeseburger from Glory Days.  And some fries.  Feeling overly full right now.  But I will be wholly committed to eating soup, soup and more soup this weekend.  So at the end of this week, I'm going to be psyched to lose 1 pound.

I'm going to Chicago for the day for a meeting that depending on the outcome I will talk more about later.  But in doing so, I'm going to get lunch with a friend probably.  I may have to use my flex points then for a Turkey Burger and a couple cheese fries from SRO, one of my favorite little dives near my old office.  Then I will be drinking water all weekend and treating myself to some lettuce and a small bowl of soup occasionally. :)  Its really not that bad, my normal 32 points is a good amount of food as long as I am planful and eat veggies and other things that are "free" to fill the space.  But this is my first weekend of our normal routine, and eating out is going to be a challenge.  I give into temptation too easily.

Speaking of my 32 points - my reward for a big weight loss was that I immediately went down from a daily allowance of 33 points to 32 points.  Not a big deal, and I'd like to think of it as a positive thing because I am smaller now so I need less points in order to continue losing weight.  But that is one less Hershey's kiss I can eat at night. :)

I need a day with Jillian Michaels for her to break me down, make me cry, understand why I want food all the time and then make me into a skinny girl.  Totally a realistic option.

Day 9 - Holy F*^&%*ing Sh!t

Day 2 of P90 - Phase 1/2 Cardio and Abs.  I had to wuss out of SO much of the first half of it where there is bouncing and jumping and jumping jacks and more bouncing.  My legs are burning still, 30 minutes after finishing. 2nd half of kickboxing, which I love.  Then the abs part.  I didn't realize how far my abs extend up to my chest.  Ridiculous.  After modifying the crap out of the workout and not doing as many reps as the dvd did, I am still feeling like I won't be able to walk tomorrow. I will be happy to be able to sit up in the morning. Holy sh!t.  But hey, this is what I wanted right?  I also want to be able to walk, but I'll walk when I'm skinny.

In other news, I went out for a lovely lunch with a coworker to Cosi - got a "light" salad.  Didn't do research.  14 freaking points.  Light my arse.  The fact that there is bacon in the salad should have been a clue, but I was so excited to go out to lunch that I didn't think straight.  Again, lesson relearned.  Do research before going out to eat.

So at the end of the day, with a couple Activity points factored in, I used up my daily points plus 2 flex points.  I want to save as much of the flex for the weekend since we have a tendency to go out for dinner and lunch once or twice and that is when I will tend to be a little bad. But 2 of the 49 flex points is acceptable. 

I am getting more and more sore as I sit here.  Mark may have to carry me to bed.  Actually, I'm still 190 lbs, maybe he'll have to drag me.  Roll me down the hall and I will use the last little bit of energy in me to crawl into bed and pass out.  Shoes still on - because removing them would be way too much effort.

In somewhat related news, I'm sitting here watching the Biggest Loser.  And NOT eating, like I have every other episode ever. 

I just coughed, and my abs hurt.  Cripes.

Day 8 - First weigh in!

This morning was my first official weigh-in of Weightwatchers.  I weight 190 lbs.  That's 8 pounds, bitches!  That's Biggest Loser kind of crazy!  OK, so I'll probably only drop 1 lb a week if I am lucky from here on out because my body will adjust to the new way of eating....but still - 8 pounds, bitches!

I also began P90 workout program today.  A 28 minute circuit training - quite doable with the adjustments that you can make, and I can see continuing to do this for a long time and being able to make it challenging with the ability to tweak the resistance of the band and increasing reps.  So this seem very promising too.  Tomorrow is a cardio workout, and will be the first time I've really pushed my ankle since smashing it into several small and very sad pieces.  Shall be interesting to see how that goes.

I am betting I will be sore tomorrow, but the point today was to get a good workout without pushing so hard that I will be too sore to workout again. Definitely think I accomplished that.

Totally flying high still on the 8 pounds.  Did I mention I lost 8 pounds?

8 pounds.

Bitches.

Day 6 - Party, party, party!

Today was the big third birthday party for my James. I ate really carefully all morning (although the act of piping multiple colors of homemade buttercream onto cupcakes results in large quantities of frosting consumed). I at moderately well at the party and have 2 flex points for the week. Yay, made it through without screwing up the first week! And like I said, I ate moderately well. In the past I probably would have eaten even more. And I feel really full right now, like uncomfortable. Which is actually a good sign, I think. Hopefully my stomach is getting used to smaller meals and I won't feel hungry as much. After just a soup for lunch, I was satisfied. Now I just need to keep this up so I hopefully get back to eating well routinely. Oman unrelated note, my first baby is 3. He can converse with me, he plays with sophisticated toys and likes to assemble the ones that have lots of pieces, he notices and points out things I miss...he is a boy. No more baby, no more toddler. A boy. I'm so proud and so sad at the same time.

Day 5 - Aw dammit

Mark and I had a lunch date since we were both home and the boys spent most of their normal time in daycare.  Had a great plan going to Panera and for the first in the history of going to Panera they didn't have their Black Bean soup.  So I panicked when I ordered, had a fantastic lunch and finally just added it up...21 points.  Crap.  And to celebrate James' birthday we did cupcakes, and the one I had was probably 15 points.  I ended up using 15 of my flex points today.  So no frosting on my cupcake tomorrow.  And I've got to really watch myself so I don't kill all my flex points. 

So my grand plan for all my flex points at the birthday party is kicked in the ass.  Pooptastic.

I'm not really hosed yet, I shouldn't be discouraged.  But its the first day that I totally slipped without knowing I was doing it.  And its totally disappointing.

Trying not to get bummed, but its hard when I'm less than a week in, and I screw up this much.

I really need to plan better, and have back-ups for anything I research before going out to lunch. 

Day 4 - My First Voyage to Chipotle

Another day of staying right at my daily points value.  Yeah, that's right.  I'm just that awesome.

I even got a big treat for lunch - took myself to Chipotle.  Dinner was a little smaller to stay where I need to be, but its so worth it for the awesomeness-in-a-bowl that is Chipotle.  I wish I could see where in the kitchen they insert the crack in their food.  I'm sure its there somewhere since I crave it all the time.  Seriously, I get the shakes if I don't have it for a week.  While staying with my in-laws over Christmas, I seriously considered sneaking out to have lunch by myself at Chipotle.  I have problems.

So its time for me to say how much I love Weightwatchers.  I don't do meetings, I can't find time for that.  But their online program is so perfect for me, and I love the app that they have.  I way prefer to do everything on my iPad because its actually easier to use the app than go to weightwatchers.com.  Major props for producing an app that is so easy to use.  And they have a companion app called WW Kitchen with all their recipes.  The recipes that you save as your favorite in that app are connected directly to your favorite in the main WW app.  Hello, WW app, I love you.

Big test this weekend.  Making a big dinner for my little man's 3rd birthday party, including cupcakes that I plan to load up with buttercream frosting.  Must.  Be.  Good.  But I have 49 flex points to blow, I wonder how much frosting I can squeeze from the bag into my mouth to get to 49 points.

Day Three - Lunch Habits

Day Three and I still have one more point to go for the day at 9:30 pm. I'm counting this as another successful day.

I am a get-away-from-the-office, eat-lunch-out kind of girl. Part of my plan is to bring lunch twice a week to the office to make life easier and save a little money. But I don't want to deprive myself completely of walking away from the office and having some social time with peers (or the occasional Chipotle lunch alone to have the little bit of me-time that I can rarely find). So today was my first lunch outing, with my boss. We went to Noodles & Company and thank you Weightwatchers for having so many restaurants in your database now. The selection was so limited when I was doing this in 2005.

My normal lunch before would have been a large macaroni and cheese with the bacon and meatballs or chili. I'm not even going to look up the point value of that, there probably isn't even a point value, it just tells you how much of your artery you closed during that meal. Plus I would have gotten a Rice Krispie treat or cookie. Today, a small Japanese Pan Noodle with beef. A bit unsatisfied afterward, but I think that will go away as my addiction to sweets and dessert subsides after doing this awhile. Last time that took about 2 weeks to break. Not that I didn't stare longingly at the Rice Krispie treat. I'm pretty sure it looked at me sadly, like I was abandoning it, but I'm sure someone else gave it a nice home. My ass doesn't meed to be its home anymore.

Dinner was some of my yummy leftovers from Monday - Cuban Rice and Black Beans and a bit of fajita chicken with veggies. That was fabulous and only a total of 12 points. I may have a chocolate truffle from my Christmas Stocking and call it a night.

Day Two - Hunger settles in

Weightwatchers and I continue to get along, but she is beginning to annoy me. My nighttime feeding habits are severely disturbed. I had to watch the Biggest Loser tonite without stuffing my face. A travesty.

Anyway, I'm hungry. Don't want to bust into my flex points with James' bday party this weekend, but am sitting here making lists to get ready for the party and daydreaming about potato chips and brownies. Mmmmmmm.

Dangit.

On the flip side, I have discovered the joys of coffee upon getting a Keurig for Christmas. That keeps me going in the morning without much food. And I'm a much easier person to be around after getting 5 hours of sleep with a crying baby. (Seriously, Bobby, you are 10 months old. Stop crying, and go get a job or something).

I've also discovered that I actually like yogurt, despite hating it for years and years. Feeding it to the kids and licking it from my fingers (and clothes and hair) for the last few years must have changed my taste. So at least that is one good outcome and improved eating habit. Swapping a yogurt for a chocolate muffin has to be a good thing.

Day One

Today, I went back on Weightwatchers. It worked fabulously about 6 years ago, and now I am fatter than ever. 6 feet tall, and 198 lbs. I want to get to at least 175, back in the realm of a normal BMI. But 170 would be ideal. My boys are 3 and 10 months old...and 38. The husband is as much of a kid as them usually. I can't blame the 10 month old for my weight, especially since I got down to 180 while breast feeding (the entire 6 weeks that worked).

So here goes. Weightwatchers this week. Next week I start exercising. I got P90 for Christmas from Santa (because my husband thought it was still a trick even tho I asked for it and told him it would NOT be considered a form of calling me fat).

Not sure if delaying the start of exercise is procrastination or really my way of trying not to overwhelm myself with change(which is what I keep telling myself). Either way, I hope that writing this all down here will Jedi mind trick me into following my plan and accomplishing my goals.